Whether it’s a typical Karan Johar film or a classic Momina Duraid drama, we’ve mentally prepared ourselves to be guests in our own homes. And one day we are then rukhsat away to a new house for our future forever. As Pakistani women, we have been planning our weddings since we were little girls. We learn it all! Cooking, cleaning, taking care of everyone, being glammed up, and even being polite and respectful.
And when you finally get the ring on your finger, all the hustle and bustle of the official wedding preparation finally starts. You’re making runs to the market every single day, going on dawats, meeting new people, everything going forward for one single day, your rukhsati.
And when you finally say your Qubool hae, a rush of emotions, followed by another set of emotions, overwhelms you. The question arises: “Now what?” Everything in your life had been building up to this day, and with two words, it all came to an end. So what now?
Most brides usually go into a state of sadness, not only because of the rukhsati itself but because of a simple emptiness. And if that’s the case for you, don’t worry; you’re experiencing post-wedding blues, and you are not alone. While your chachi, khaala, and phupho may claim they never faced such modern-day issues, believe us, they did. Perhaps it lasted less than yours, but it certainly did.
Worry not at Shaadi Tayari; once we’ve worked with you on the overall wedding plan, we won’t leave you to deal with your post-wedding blues. So come back, grab a cup of tea, and learn from us how to overcome the post-wedding blues as a desi bride.
First of all, What is a Post-Wedding Blue?
Post-wedding blues are the emotional lows that many brides experience after the excitement and chaos of their wedding have subsided. After months of planning elaborate mehndi functions, grand baraats, and dazzling walimas, life returns to its usual routine.
The excitement of wedding shopping, selecting the perfect lehenga, and hosting endless family gatherings fade into memories, leaving a void in life. Many brides find it difficult to adjust to new life, especially in a new home. All of the attention, pampering, and expectations associated with the bride’s preparations to start a new life with her groom gradually fade away.
Disillusionment with married life then sets in. They are disappointed or sad because they miss the wedding season. One which was full of energy, love for family, and joy for celebrating with friends. These post-wedding blues are normal and temporary as life settles into a new, beautiful rhythm.
The Signs of Post-Wedding Blues Our Desi Brides Experience
Post-wedding blues is just like an emotional roller coaster. Sometimes you are all high on the emotions of your newlywed life, and sometimes the low makes you feel like crawling under the bed and rethinking your decisions. Here are a few signs that you are going through post-wedding blues as a desi bride and not just having a bad day.
Wedding Withdrawal:
After months of organizing, going through outfit trials, multiple phone calls, and meeting new people, now there’s nothing to do. There is no argument around the lehenga stitching or the drama caused by your phupho. It’s simply quiet, and you can feel the silence right through your core!
Missing the Attention:
For more than a year, you were the center of attention. All your relatives and friends used to hype you up, tease you with your partner’s name and hold family dawats to pamper you up. After all, you were a guest just for a few days. But now that all is gone, life seems a bit too normal.
The Bridal Glow is Gone:
The amount of services, facials, spas, mani-pedis, and treatments you got for that one special day wears off with time. The worst part? You start noticing it.
Clothes Overload:
You have a wardrobe full of heavily embroidered lehengas and sarees, but nowhere fancy enough to wear them! And you wonder whether you will ever wear that wedding jora again.
Lack of Drama:
During your wedding month, or perhaps a year, all you could hear was people bantering, chatting, and talking about things you had no idea about. And the family drama was just on another level. And now that you are rukhsatified, there’s silence. No drama, no chatting, and no gossip. The sudden silence in the house feels almost unsettling.
Honeymoons Over-Literally:
Reality hits hard when you return from your honeymoon and resume your daily chores and work routine. The end of fancy trips and fun activities makes you feel empty and start questioning: Will this feeling ever come again?
Missing Shaadi Food:
Face the reality, nobody makes biryani or kebabs like the wedding caterer. You start missing those extravagant wedding feasts after returning to your regular home meals.
Identity Crisis:
When you move into a new family or are no longer “the bride,” you begin to feel a shift in role. It takes some time to transition from being the centre of great celebration to living in earnest.
How to Overcome Post-Wedding Blues as a Desi Bride
Embrace The Change, Not The End
As a desi bride, most of your wedding day must have been a colourful celebration, with innumerable events and whirlwind emotions. The sudden calm, therefore, can be bewildering. Quit resisting this change and celebrate this new chapter.
You should focus less on the wedding planning frenzy and more on the pleasures of your new life. Be it discovering married life or deep diving into personal goals that you may have had to put on hold for this new chapter.
Recreate The Magic in Small Ways
In many cases, post-wedding blues are the post-honeymoon depression—the longing for that extraordinary excitement of the big day. But think of it: you don’t have to have an elaborate shindig to keep the fire burning.
Simply plan cosy dinner dates, revisit your wedding album, share words of pure affection, and even recreate any of the dishes that you had at your wedding. Let the small moments of happiness remind you of the significance of your special day, and keep that spark alive.
Stay Connected With Your Circle
One of the common signs of feeling the post-wedding blue as a desi bride is the feeling of loneliness. And the best way to cope with it is by being in touch with your family, friends, and even cousins.
Call them up, invite them for a chai session, or simply go have lunch. Lean into those relationships that helped make your wedding special. And remember, your support system is still there for you in this new phase of life.
Wrapping it up!
It is normal to miss the wedding’s excitement, attention, and celebrations. This can be an unsettling feeling for most desi brides, who may have welcomed post-wedding blues after the whirlwind of wedding festivities had ended.
After all, it is a significant life milestone that encourages everyone to embrace new opportunities. Instead of dwelling on the emptiness, seek out small moments and recreate the magic through cosy dates and special meals, as well as staying in touch with your loved ones. And trust us with Shaadi Tayari; you’ll be back to your fun little excited self in no time. For more insight on both pre-and post-Shaadi planning, visit Shaadi Tayari now!